Golden Time Of Day

Last time you'll hear me say it....tonight is THE night. Happy hour. Do that, do that.

Ok, so I live in NY. That means I spend an ungodly amount of time on public transportation. Idle time is the devil's playground, so I try to use that time wisely: reading, listening to 90's music on my iPod and plotting on how I can get @HeavyD to follow me on Twitter and having serious internal debates about this thing called life. I've decided to share a few of my recent thoughts with you. Take a peek in to my dark and light recesses.

1) Why was that fine ass man in the "Say Yes" video doing the puppets?
Since Universal Music Group is some haters, click here to see what I mean. This is why the gods and the ancestors decided I should not have a good singing voice. Cause I would be all like "Ok, I was thinking, let's just skip the whole puppet/train station thing and have the scene be in front of my house. And we are walking in, and then we are going to bed, so he's giving me a massage. Actually, do you guys have to be there, or can you just leave the camera?"

At least he was good looking! I have seen some sisters have some real....interesting looking fellas as their leading video mens. Not naming names, as we are all beautiful in God's eyes. But, um...if it's my video, I'm going out like Elzabeth Withers. Except I would end the video with a wedding scene with me and him. And get a real preacher and yell out "NO TAKEBACKS" after the director says "Cut". Mwahahahahaha.

2) I went to some pretty great schools, so why do I form sentences like "Why was that fine man doing the puppets" in my internal monologue?

3) Sir Fab, Sister Head Mistress and I were in a bar the other night. Drunnnnk. So I say "Let's sing songs!" And we do. And the first one was Anita Baker's "Sweet Love". So Sir Fab keeps sending me emails that say "Let's sing songs." And I thought about that on the C last night, started laughing and had to put my head down to keep people from thinking I am crazy.

4) I think my dress makes me look fat today and what if people come to the HAPPY HOUR and think I am fat? OMG, maybe I am fat and because I used to be more fat, people just tell me I am not. And when did I become such a fat shamer? And I know my soul is fat, because I almost cried yesterday because I miss desserts so much and I am getting a little tired of protien bars. And all these veggies are making me bloated, there is a Beano shortage in Brooklyn and what is the point of eating healthy if I look pregnant?>

5) Why are people more concerned with the realease of Mike Vick than the continiues imprisonment of Mumia Abu Jamal?

6) Titty sweat season is coming. DAMN.

7) What would be an approriate venue for rolling around and performing "Darling Nicki?"

8) What if no one comes to this event tonight? I will feel like a loser. ARE YOU COMING TONIGHT, NYC?

Happy Hour/Meet and Greet
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
6:00pm - 9:00pm
Taj Lounge
48 W 21st St, New York, NY
To RSVP, drop me a line: sistertoldja@thebeautifulstruggler.com

I have on a green sweater and I have frizzy hair and I am tall. Please say hello!
9) Was Maze ever NOT "featuring Frankie Beverly"? Was Frankie Beverly ever without Maze?


10) Has there ever been an Essence Music Festival without them?

Farewell, good people! NYC, I hope to see you tonight. Fellow Jezebel starred commentors, I will meet y'all tommorrow!

See you soon!
Sister Toldja