Ok, so my boss is sitting RIGHT behind me. And as he used to be a blogger, he knows that Blogger is NOT a work related site. So I gotta do this quick, ya dig?
We took the children to see "Horton Hears A Who". I laughed a few times, but I have now realized that I don't like kids movies. In fact, I don't like kid things. With the exception of books, baby dolls and tea sets (and a few cartoons and shows), I think most kid things suck and are corny. I don't want corny-ass Hannah Montana-obsessed kids. I want cool kids named Theolonious and Nina that can like Jazz and poetry.
Five For Friday: Silly Things That Make Me Nervous About Having Kids
1) Getting Bored By Things They Like-
I may be the only person in the world who hates Spongebob, but I don't think that guy is funny AT ALL! I just don't see me suffering through all this new Disney crap either. My kids will be on some classic ish: Sesame Street, Ezra Jack Keats, Arrested Development, etc.
2)Tomboys-
I will love my little ones no matter what, but I think it would be...challenging for me to have a daughter who didn't stand for the same things I believe in. You know, lip gloss, lace, tea parties.
3)What If They Aren't Cool?
What if my kids aren't as funky, fresh and fly as I? What if despite my efforts to make them into little bohemian hipsters (but not WILLIAMSBURG devil-hipsters) like their mommy, they like corny shit, like whatever's popping at the moment? What if they like top-40 music?
One word: Medea.
Uh, a few more words: not the Tyler Perry one. The one who killed her kids.
Two more words: just kidding.
Two more more words: but still.....
4)All Girls?!?
I want sons sooooo bad. What if I keep popping out girls. God seems to have a sense of humor with me, so I think I'll be wise and only have two natural births without having a boy. At that point, I'm snatching a cute one from the mall going to the adoption home, or to that magical doctor that chooses your baby's sex.
And finally....
5) What If They Don't Worship The Ground I Walk On?!?!?!
Seriously, I think my kids should see me as the most beautiful, intelligent, magical, fun and special woman in the whole wide world. The prototype for all future girlfriends for my sons and the standard by which my daughter judges herself. But what if they reject me and all my values? What if they rather be stupid and not realize that they momma is the bombest?
Annnnd, now we understand why I need about 8-10 more years of personal development before I procreate.
Hallelujah holla back!
Reverend Toldja
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Friday, March 14, 2008
Five For Friday- Me And The Kids
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7 props:
Lol@Hallelujah Holla Back
I think there is a chance for all you listed to happen....kids have their own minds and when they start to get older they allow more than what they were raised with to influence them....however Im sure they will definetly worship the ground you walk on, you sound like you would be a good MOM!! De-lurking to tell you I love your five for fridays......
Hannah "blowjob face" Montana is top reason why my reproductive system rests comfortably in the back of my fridge
then everything you mentioned (only I want punk rockers with pink hair and what have you)
another reason would be: Stretch Marks
Wow!...........you hate SpongeBob Squarepants!!!! Please say it aint so. What about Patrick, Mr.Crabs, or even Sandy? (I know waaaay too much about that show LOL) My nephew got me hook (well actually junior year in college).
Seriously, I think you would be a cool mom, CRAZY, but cool. Just don't be one of those moms' who dress past their time and dirty dance at children's parties. My mother's friend could make a seasoned whore blush. And everyone has a mother who has/had a friend that does this.
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Lolll! And I might just be the second person who does not get the appeal of SpongeBob AT ALL. So yeah, that's a genuine fear... (spongebob + teletubbies = Nightmare!)
And your kids will love you and worship the ground you walk on no matter what.... that is until they turn 12. Lol!
I am gonna save this for when you have kids and none of this comes true. LOL
I have two daughters and I want to go for a 3rd child, but I just can't. What if my husband is a girl-maker and I get another girl. I would pull my hair out, so I can't do it. My friend had 3 girls and her 4th was her boy. I'll have to pass. I am hating the whole Hannah Montana. My kids actually watch Law & Order with and they know the theme music. My babies are not even 2 yet. Kids think you are great until you tell them no!!
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